Dr Eugene's blogs

One man lived in the heart of a very busy city. One day, he woke up and realized something has changed. His neighbours were gone. His street, the busy roads, and the market places were all empty. He could not find a soul. He was dreadfully alone. As he walked along looking for any sign of life, he heard a sound from afar. When he drew closer to the sound, he could hear people talking. 'Yes, yes, y es!' He ran towards the sound. It was close to a river. The sound was coming from a boat. As he drew nearer, he saw the boat moving away. He shouted, 'Wait! Wait! Wait!' The engine of the speed boat drowned his scream. The boat left and this man was all alone. He turned in despair and walked home alone. Then, he woke up. It was a dream, a nightmare. This guy has been a loner. Even though, he lived in a busy city and knew a number of persons, he lived alone and kept to his own business. He had no friends; no one to notice when he gets missing. He could have died very much a...

The day I met you I had an epiphany Your skin radiates in resplendent ebony With a voice resonating in amazing symphony To your endearing qualities I give testimony Our souls in synch: perfect harmony ‘You are meant to be’ said Mr. Destiny I had flashes of a wonderful Holy Matrimony Then came a ‘little’ acrimony From the ‘ordained’ arrangement, you sought mutiny You left with a bye-bye ceremony And my heart left in agony I walked out my front balcony Raised my hands and voice in somber litany My body trembled with violent tetany The day I met you was bright and sunny The day you left was dark and rainy Nature recognized the difference and irony ©Dr Eugene’s Blogs ( http://dreugeneoji.blogspot.com/ ) ©Dr Eugene’s Column ( http://dreugeneojirigho.blogspot.com/ )

Whitney, full of life in great measure A voice that drenched my soul in much pleasure In entertainment, a cynosure To the world, a priceless treasure A lady of fine disposure Had carriage and elegant composure She niched her place in history’s literature Sought her own family’s structure And insured her dependents’ future The elements of a fine creature With heavenly grace and godly nature Then came her drug use disclosure Sad! Imagine being trapped in Hell’s tortures Haunted by ‘demons’ and corporate vultures And taunted by fame’s exposure Reminds me of Philip Seymour’s last impressure To Michael Jackson’s censure From Amy Winehouse’ misadventures To Cory Monteith’s confitures Whitney, battered by career’s forfeitures Her hard work threatened by finite erasure Sombre thoughts drowned in an enclosure Overwhelmed by Death’s embrasure Alas! Her voice and music outlived Death’s closure The story of her life spurns tales and con...

I once saw a small barber’s shop that had this huge sign in front, ‘Barbing Institute.’ O boy, the question is, ‘Na which certificate them dey award? OND (Barbing) or HND (Barbing) or B.Sc. (Barbing) or simply Certificate in Barber-ship? I once saw a sign-board that read, ‘Goodness and Mercy Bar and Restaurant.’ After taking several rounds of beer, one guy picked up his phone to receive a call, ‘Hello, please, come and meet me at Gulder and Messi Bar.’ One other day, this same guy forgot his wallet at home and he only realized that he had no money on him after several rounds of drinks. When the owner of the restaurant descended on him, the guy pleaded, ‘Please, have goodness and mercy on me! Is that not the name of your bar?’ I wonder how he was able to say the correct name this time. One young man walked by one company that had a sign: Vacancy! Vacancy! Vacancy! He went in and met the receptionist. He inquired about the kinds of jobs available. He was told that they a...

Years ago, there was a political slogan that ran on National TV. It read, ‘Who the cap fits, let him wear it.’ I saw a political poster recently that read, ‘Who will wear the shoe, if not you?’ Well, since political slogans and adverts have to do with wearing things, I’ve come with several options: ‘Who the coat fits, let him wear it.’ ‘Who will wear the suit, if not you?’ ‘Who the eyeglasses fits, let him wear it.’ ‘Who the boxers size, let him carry go.’ ‘Who the diamond ring fits, let her wear it ooo.’ ‘Who the golden necklace fits, let her wear it.’ ‘Who the Igbese wrapper resemble, let her wear it ooo.’ ‘Who the koikoi shoe sizes, let her carry go.’ ‘Who will enter the bullet-proof jeep, if not you?’ ‘Who will chop the money, if not you?’ ©Dr Eugene’s Column ( http://dreugeneojirigho.blogspot.com/ ) ©Dr Eugene’s Blogs ( http://dreugeneoji.blogspot.com/ )

A Professor of Microbiology paid a social visit to one family. They had planned to have dinner together. Unfortunately, the wife of the host was having upper respiratory tract infection and so she was having incessant sneezing. When she sneezed the first time, the Prof murmured to himself, ‘Bless you. Streptococcus pneumoniae!’ When she sneezed again, he said, ‘Haemophilus influenza; God have mercy!’ The third time she sneezed, Prof said more audibly, ‘Moraxella catarrhalis; Jesus!’ Meanwhile, the dinner was prepared with a lot of spices and pepper. This made the Prof to have a loud and violent sneeze. The wife of the host shouted, ‘Mycobacterium tuberculosis. The devil is a liar.’ ©Dr Eugene’s Column ( http://dreugeneojirigho.blogspot.com/ ) ©Dr Eugene’s Blogs ( http://dreugeneoji.blogspot.com/ )

A young man, who has a passion for writing poems, decided to write a very lovely poem to his lady friend on Valentine. He wrote the poem in a special card, wrapped it in a gift pack and sent it to his friend on Valentine’s Day. Shortly after the lady got the gift, she sent this message to the young man, ‘I’ve been looking through the gift package you sent. I only saw a hand-written note. Where’s the gift? It’s like you forgot to add it to the gift package.’ Well, the young man was disappointed. How could he tell her that the hand-written note he had spent a lot of mental and emotional energy to write over several hours was the gift? Another young Nigerian man decided to go to a florist and he bought a huge set of flowers. He then sent it to his lady friend on Valentine’s Day. When he got to the lady’s apartment, he discovered that the flower has been dismantled and torn apart. He was alarmed. ‘What happened?’ He asked. The lady replied, ‘I was looking for the gift in the flowe...